Executive function strategies
3 strategiesPre-Visit Story or Photo Book
Make a simple 5-page booklet: photos of Grandma's house, Grandma's face, a favorite toy there, what he eats there, and your child's bed or spot there. Read it together the evening before and morning of the visit. Familiarity built through images reduces the novelty anxiety that grandparent visits can trigger, especially after time gaps between visits.
Grandparent Briefing Sheet
Give Grandma a one-page written summary of your child's current: sensory sensitivities (foods, sounds, textures), communication strategies (signs, PECS, device), calming tools, and which behaviors to ignore vs. redirect. Children often show increased dysregulation with caregivers who unknowingly use inconsistent strategies. Consistency of approach matters more than who is doing the caregiving.
Gradual Exposure for Infrequent Visits
If Grandma visits rarely, begin with short visits (1-2 hours) before overnight stays. Use video calls in the week before a visit so your child sees Grandma's face and voice in a low-demand setting. Familiarity with the person outside of the transition moment makes the actual handoff much smoother.
Activity game
Grandma's Special Box
Keep a "Grandma box" at Grandma's house - a small container of 3-4 toys or activities that only come out during Grandma visits and are stored away otherwise. The novelty and exclusivity of the box makes arriving at Grandma's associated with anticipation rather than anxiety. Let your child be the one to open the box when he arrives as a consistent arrival ritual.
ABA strategies
2 tipsTeach Grandma the same language
A skill your child has learned at home may not automatically transfer to Grandma's house - this is called a generalization problem. ABA specifically plans for this by using the same instructions, same visual tools, and same reinforcers across different people and settings. Give Grandma the exact words and visuals you use at home. When the environment feels familiar even in a new place, your child's behavior reflects the skills he actually has.
Build familiarity before the visit
In ABA, a new environment or person is less threatening if your child has had low-demand exposure to her first. Video calls in the days before Grandma visits, a photo book about Grandma's house, wearing something he will wear there - all of these reduce novelty on the day of the visit. Novelty is a common trigger for dysregulation. Pre-exposure turns a new stimulus into a familiar one before demands are placed on it.
Press the button when it is time to transition!